Saturday, February 9, 2013

New Lows

The question of where I went wrong in life has haunted me for a long time. I'm pretty sure I ended up where I am because of a million small choices, rather than one colossal error in judgment, but this insight has so far failed to help me right the ship. Indeed, I am reaching new lows. For example, the other day my friend, Dee, and I drank Sutter Home Pinot Grigio from single serve bottles with straws in the parking structure at work. Let's break down all the ways this is wrong. And by wrong, I don't mean drinking on the job. That's the only thing right about this situation. 1) Pinot Grigio is just about the last wine I ever want to drink. Of course since I now regularly consume PBR, it is obvious that I'm willing to drink anything as long as it contains alcohol. 2) Sutter Home is not exactly quality wine. Then again, if I wanted quality, I wouldn't be drinking Pinot Grigio. 3) We were drinking with straws. This, my friends, is a true sign of class and sophistication as is 4) We were in a parking structure. Sure we used lunch at Craft and dine at Mozza, drink Burgundy and Brunello, but look at us now--drinking plonk through a straw in a parking structure. Oh how the mighty have fallen. Today, Sutter Home. Tomorrow, Mad Dog 20/20. Pass me that bottle. And a's to new lows!

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